Revving up for Crystal’s New Prototype           Crystal has begun a new collaboration with Chevrolet and the National Hot Rod Association (NHRA), to produce a 1500 horsepower variant of the popular Titan jet. If rumors are to be believed, the device can reach heights of over 2000 feet in less than 3 seconds. VP of Chevy’s racing division Max Powers says, “Crystal is a world class organization, we’re excited to be working with such a dedicated team. This is just the beginning for Chevy Racing and Crystal.” With the first US project for this monumental new jet technology soon to be announced, significant negotiation was needed to obtain clearances from the FAA, NASA, DOD, Homeland Security and the NSA. Lead negotiator John Barratt announced the coup last week. “It took some convincing, but we got it done. The thing that swung them over was thinking we were backed by the NRA not the NHRA. I didn’t see the value in correcting them.” Preliminary tests at Crystal’s top secret R&D facility have been quite promising,” chuckled Mirush Trimi, Crystal’s resident mad scientist. “Not only were we able to achieve considerable altitude but each Titan discharge measured at least 3.5 on the Richter scale. There might have been some spontaneous combustion as well. I’m overjoyed.” CEO Paul L’Heureux weighed in, “It’s totally off strategy, but when I saw the prototype put a frozen turkey through a half inch steel plate, I knew we had to build it. Sometimes you’ve got to go with your gut.” “I am beyond excited to be working with a company that truly understands what serious velocity, displacement, torque, horsepower is all about. Chevy is helping us shoot for the moon on this one. Literally.” exclaimed Business Development Manager Darcy L’Heureux. He added, “I can’t wait to get these things installed in a playdeck!” Customers will be happy to know that the jet is fully represented in the latest release of WATERlab. According to Chief Technology Officer Vincent Francis, “In order to accurately depict jet performance we had to model cloud collisions in the simulation and account for the Coriolis Effect for the first time. It surprised me.” On the topic of brand consistency, Art Director Jongmu Lee noted, “It is something we are working on, but at the moment we are letting Chevy take the lead. Given their excellent track record, I would expect fire, inspiration, and rock & roll.” “As a recent addition to the Crystal team, I am convinced that they are certifiable,” says COO Louie Shoukas. When asked what started the concept, Chief Innovation Officer, George Ayer shrugged, “I’m sick of safety and sustainability.”                 www.crystalfountains.com